The Sass and Snark of Steve Rogers.
little soldier boy, come marching home
Take off your shirt, your tie and your hat.
#the day nat and steve meet #she makes a joke about him being really old #do you think she does this to him every day #oH LOOK STEVE LET’S GO INTO THIS ANTIQUE SHOP #IM GONNA SEE HOW MUCH THEY’LL PAY ME FOR YOU #despite him being physically like #30 or whatever #she insists on putting 95 candles on his birthday cake #and taking him to museums and telling him where in the dinosaur exhibit he would probably be #she asks him if it was cool back when the mayflower came over to america #did you have fun building the continental railroad #did you swim across the pacific and make a trek to visit Jesus or did you just stay in america all the time #i bet these jokes are daily and they never stop #and somehow they always get steve to laugh
Pack your bags, kiddies, we’re flying economy
something that i noticed on the third rewatch of captain america: for a really fucking lonely guy steve sure has a lot of eating paraphernalia in his house, like at least 20 different glasses. and ~artistically arranged~ too.
so months ago, natasha probably came over to steve’s apartment (actually broke into steve’s apartment to play videogames and rifle through his medicine cabinet) and encountered the single lonely table. the single lonely bowl he owns with the single lonely chipped mug. one single lonely radio. one picture of the howling commandos taped to the wall with one single lonely piece of masking tape. and she’s just like this is disgusting i’m drowning in my own tears ugh
then steve comes home to find natasha sitting at his table, eating his raisin bran and glaring at him and he’s like jesus christ !!!! and she’s like we’re going to ikea you human disaster
steve’s like, i don’t appreciate your tone and also we should really talk about this breaking and entering thing as he obediently follows her to the car