- A lot of Natasha’s mysterious reputation around SHIELD stems from the fact that she sometimes doesn’t know how to end a conversation so she’ll dive away Batman style when the other person’s back is turned.
- Whenever Natasha walks into a room, she immediately ranks everyone in it from most to least threatening, then favorite to least favorite. For the second list, no one can match Tony’s ability to go from a respectable placing to dead last in the span of one sentence.
- She’ll watch any movie with “shark” in the title, provided the movie is also objectively terrible.
- Natasha loves emojis.
- Natasha genuinely enjoyed spending time with Pepper while investigating Tony, but once her mission was over, Natasha immediately disappeared to avoid the awkwardness of the “so hey, I was undercover and everything I told you about myself was a lie” conversation. Then Maria starts working at Stark Industries and arranges power lunches that seem a lot like the three women getting mimosas and complaining about their day, and now Natasha and Pepper have a standing dinner date every time they’re in the same city.
- She changes her hair so often for the novel joy of being able to choose what she looks like. Natasha has liked all her hairstyles, except that one perm which we don’t talk about or acknowledge existed, Clint, don’t you dare show those pictures to Steve.
- She knows it’s childish, but Natasha identifies to an uncomfortable degree with any robot character who seems to be programmed to experience emotion, especially if the humans around them doubt the robot really feels anything. (It’s not like she’s written anything down about it, she’s not that sad, but for the past decade Natasha has been working on this version of Blade Runner where it’s this replicant who’s the hero, and she ends up escaping Earth and heads off to explore alien planets with a mech-shark she stole from the Tyrell Corporation, it sounds dumb but it’s actually very exciting and oh god, Natasha is that sad.)
- Once Natasha left her phone on Sam’s kitchen table. When she came back two minutes later, Sam and Steve had managed to take eighty-two selfies. She kept them all. It’s embarrassing how happy they make her.
- But it’s more embarrassing to Sam and Steve when Natasha shows the selfies to Maria and Pepper at lunch, and that makes Natasha pretty happy too.
#the day nat and steve meet #she makes a joke about him being really old #do you think she does this to him every day #oH LOOK STEVE LET’S GO INTO THIS ANTIQUE SHOP #IM GONNA SEE HOW MUCH THEY’LL PAY ME FOR YOU #despite him being physically like #30 or whatever #she insists on putting 95 candles on his birthday cake #and taking him to museums and telling him where in the dinosaur exhibit he would probably be #she asks him if it was cool back when the mayflower came over to america #did you have fun building the continental railroad #did you swim across the pacific and make a trek to visit Jesus or did you just stay in america all the time #i bet these jokes are daily and they never stop #and somehow they always get steve to laugh
something that i noticed on the third rewatch of captain america: for a really fucking lonely guy steve sure has a lot of eating paraphernalia in his house, like at least 20 different glasses. and ~artistically arranged~ too.
so months ago, natasha probably came over to steve’s apartment (actually broke into steve’s apartment to play videogames and rifle through his medicine cabinet) and encountered the single lonely table. the single lonely bowl he owns with the single lonely chipped mug. one single lonely radio. one picture of the howling commandos taped to the wall with one single lonely piece of masking tape. and she’s just like this is disgusting i’m drowning in my own tears ugh
then steve comes home to find natasha sitting at his table, eating his raisin bran and glaring at him and he’s like jesus christ !!!! and she’s like we’re going to ikea you human disaster
steve’s like, i don’t appreciate your tone and also we should really talk about this breaking and entering thing as he obediently follows her to the car
If you know my name….then you should know I don’t play by anyone’s rules.
Scarlett Johansson as Black Widow in Captain America: The Winter Soldier
This is the picture I commissioned from Gingerhaze! My exact email went like this: "I would like to commission a picture of Hawkeye and Black Widow dressed up like James Bond and a Bond Girl. (I’m not picky on which one is dressed like which, wink wink)" and Noelle knew exactly what to do.
I’m keeping the high-res version all to myself (except for the copy that I’m going to print and hang in my cubicle at work, because people should know who they’re dealing with) :P
best thing evar